This Is Why No One Trusts HR

HR.

Recruiters.

Love 'em? Rarely.

Tolerate 'em? Sometimes.

Trust 'em? Ehhh. 🤷‍♂️

Here’s the deal:

Words matter.

The language shapes how HR sees people —
And how people see HR.

And that language?

Not great...

Human resources – Because nothing says “we value you” like lumping you in with office supplies. 🖨️

Human capital – Just slap a barcode on your soul and call it synergy. 🏷️

Human asset – Limited-edition collectible. Comes with burnout and performance anxiety. 🃏

Manpower – Peak 1950s energy. Feels like Mad Men with worse benefits. 📞

Labor pool – Cannonball into career limbo. Hope you float. 🏊‍♂️

FTEs – You’re not even a full human. You’re math. 🧮

Head hunter – Nothing weird about describing recruitment like ritual sacrifice. 🪓

Talent acquisition – People are not Pokémon. You don’t catch them. 🛒

Talent pipeline – Ah yes, the human-toothpaste conveyor belt. 🧴

Recruitment funnel – You will be squeezed. You will be filtered. You will be ghosted. 🧃

Right-sizing – Translation: “We fired you. But with PowerPoint.” 🎯

Attrition – Everyone’s leaving. Leadership? Shocked and confused. 😲

Outplacement – You’re out. But here’s a PDF and a well-meaning shrug. 📄

Workforce optimization – Let’s break fewer people, more efficiently. 💣

Succession planning – Smile! Someone’s polishing your nameplate. 😬

More Accurate:
People aren’t assets.
Or resources.
Or capital.
Or fractional math problems.

People are divine freaking miracles. ✨

Messy. Complex. Beautiful.

And so are you. In fact, you're a messy, complex, beautiful miracle that I'd like to connect with -->  Eric Woodard

🚀 Let's get your career stuff handled, find time to talk here. 📲